The Krabby Kronicle

"Ha! Nobody reads the Examiner, bud. It's all full of boring charts and facts! The Bottomfeeder's where it's at! It's got like interesting stories and stuff."

- Incidental 41

"The Krabby Kronicle" is the second segment of the ninth episode of season 6, and it is paired with "Boating Buddies." In this episode, Mr. Krabs opens a newspaper business after realizing how much money newspapers rake in by telling exaggerated stories.

Characters

 * SpongeBob SquarePants
 * Eugene H. Krabs
 * Identity thief
 * Sewer monster
 * Patrick Star
 * Pole
 * Mrs. Puff
 * Highway Speed Control
 * Larry the Lobster
 * Trainer
 * Sheldon J. Plankton
 * Karen Plankton
 * Andy Yellowtail
 * Sandy Cheeks
 * The Neptunian Science Committee

Plot
Mr. Krabs finds out from SpongeBob that his ad in the Bikini Bottom Examiner has not brought any customers to the Krusty Krab as everyone is buying The Bottomfeeder as it contains more exciting stories. After seeing how much newspapers charge for advertising, he starts a newspaper business.

Mr. Krabs gives SpongeBob the job as the press, so he goes into town to find interesting stories. He doesn't find any interesting stories until he sees Patrick standing next to a pole, so he writes about that. However, the customers find it boring, so Mr. Krabs tells him to add imagination to the story, and changes it to say that Patrick got married to the pole.

SpongeBob writes several more stories with lies sprinkled in to make them more exciting, while slowly getting more annoyed with this tactic. He tries to complain to Mr. Krabs, but he threatens to take away his spatula if he doesn't make more stories. After awhile, SpongeBob has written about everyone in town and doesn't want to ruin any more people's lives, but Mr. Krabs tells him to write the wildest story he can come up with.

He gets the idea to write about Mr. Krabs abusing his employees for money. The next day, the customers riot on Mr. Krabs after reading the newspaper and take away his money. He gets upset as his money is gone, but then gets the idea to use his Printing Press to make copies of his last dollar bill.